Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Stuck in My Head

Finally, I've gotten a song other than "Spaceman" stuck in my head. Of course, the song's name is "Astronaut". I don't know what my current obsession with celestial travelers is all about, but it is a gorgeous song, is it not? There really is something awfully poetic about astronauts that most people don't really think about. I mean, the word 'astronaut' literally means 'star sailor'. It doesn't get more poetic than that. Just think - you're in love with someone who's high above everyone, striving for the farthest point they can see, taking the ultimate risk for science, for knowledge...sailing through the stars...
Can you see me getting all starry-eyed over here?
The thing is, so few people think of science as being poetic or beautiful. They think of mad scientists, destroying the world, or at the very least, cold, Vulcan-like, morally questionable government men in lab coats and goggles, testing bombs or cutting up unicorns. In truth, though, science and art aren't incompatible.  Both are ways of looking at the world, peeling back the layers, learning about things. Art is just more concerned with expressing, portraying, examining the world as is, while science is concerned with revealing the world, finding new things, and figuring out how it works. Both are beautiful, and both are tied into the pursuit of knowledge, which is a high virtue.
Besides, one of the best things about science is that it finds so many new things for art to depict.

I recently bought a song book of Amanda Palmer songs, and I am learning to play "Astronaut" on the piano. I think I want to be Amanda Palmer when I grow up. Just add that to my list of occupations, okay?
Writer, seamstress, neurologist, punk cabaret pianist...

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Sneak Peek

After a while, all of the prom dresses you can buy at the store all start looking alike. They have similar cuts, colors, and patterns. They're all pretty, but...boring. This year, I told myself that my prom dress was going to be the most unique dress ever, so help me FSM.

So, far, so good:

Found: Weirdness on the Internet

I'm not even sure where this stuff comes from. Here are some French ducks in a storm.

And here's a cat organ. I cannot offer you any kind of explanation, because I don't have one. It is literally a guy playing an organ made of cats. ...Honestly, it may be better not to ask why.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012


In my defense, I'm still learning to use my sewing machine (Johannes) and I can't always be expected to remember things like "always, always, always lower the presser foot before beginning to sew."

Hey, I remembered how to wind a bobbin and pick up the bottom thread; cut me a little slack, will ya?

Tuesday, March 20, 2012


n). The state of being unseasonable.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Ethnography of a Cemetery

For English class a while back, we were charged with studying a group of people and writing an ethnography. An ethnography is a paper on a particular "culture" of people, be it the patrons of a coffee shop or the people of an entire nation. In the paper, you are supposed to determine the rules by which the people live, especially if they're different from any stated rules, and you must figure out how the people are similar and what it takes to become one of them.
I actually wrote my paper on the Apple store at the mall, but the other day I was sitting in the cemetery having a picnic and came up with this gem.

Ethnography of a Cemetery

Day 1: Spent day sketching in cemetery and slowly making my presence seem normal to them. Soon they will all forget I'm here at all... if they even notice I'm here in the first place. They're sort of a sedentary lot.

Day 8: Struck up a conversation with a lovely old woman today. She didn't talk much, but she nodded and twitched occasionally, and once she looked at me. That was actually the result of her eyes dropping out of her head, but I could tell she was interested. I think she need a bath, though.

Day 14: Am getting frustrated. None of the locals will talk to me. I will pleasantly attempt to start some small talk, but none of them respond. As far as I can tell, I've done nothing wrong - I have neither been offensive nor off-putting. I can only assume it's because I'm an outsider, and they are naturally suspicious of those unlike them.

Day 25: Today I tried to blend in with the natives by laying very still in the grass. I even acquired one of the fancy carved rocks that they all place by their head, and which I assume is a sign of social standing. The more important ones all appear to have the largest, fanciest rocks. I wonder if I do this consistently they will eventually come to accept me as one of their own.

Day 31: The natives here are still not talking to me. I'm not certain, and I hesitate to use this explanation as an excuse for ending my study, but I think, maybe, potentially, it's because they're all dead.

Friday, March 16, 2012


Gilligan the Electrophoresis Gel: Late January, 2012 - March 16th, 2012.

He was a good electrophoresis gel. He served us well, along with his brother Steve, throughout our AP Biology labs, never once eating our DNA samples or detaining us after class to scrub all the dye off of him (okay, except for that one time). He never ceased  to delight, with his adorable name and itty bitty squishy face. Truly, he brought a ray of sunshine into our lives.
He was a good gel. May he go on to a better place (i.e. a nice landfill), where perhaps he will be reunited with Steve. He will  be forever in our hearts.
Rest in peace, Gilligan. Rest in peace.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Remember Crazy Rapture Guy?

Does anyone remember Harold Camping, the crazy cracker radio host who was broadcasting that the world was going to end last May 21st? And who, when the world spectacularly did not end, moved his prediction to October 21st?
With less flash and bang, the world also failed to end in October as well. I guess Harold has been holding out hope for a glorious apocalypse, because only now has he issued an apology. A kind of weak and feeble one at that, really, for a guy who exploited a bunch of gullible people, and took their donations and life savings for whatever use of his own.

I find it interesting that he only now noticed the Bible verse where it says "No man will know the day of His coming", when surely he had piles of Christians firing it at him for the entire time he was proclaiming his bull feces.
I also find it interesting that he's happy that people are out "appreciating the Bible" or what not because of him, as a significant portion of atheists cite "reading the Bible" as their reason for apostasy. (The runner up was "thinking about it.") Ever read the Old Testament? Sordid stuff. Even the New Testament isn't all daisies and sunshine - there is quite a bit of hell fire, damnation, and Orwellian-style brainwashing. Really, the last thing Mr. Camping should be hoping for is more people reading the Bible. Chances are, some of them will be intellectually honest and reach a logical conclusion about the universe and probably about Mr. Camping himself.

Then and again, apocalypse pronouncers have never been known to be the brightest daisy in the compost heap. You know, considering how they have all been wrong.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Happy International Women's Day!

It's a regular feature of our not-always-so-great country, but lately I have been hearing a surfeit of stories of misogyny and sexism. Kansas legislature has been actively stripping away women's health rights in a way that can't be legal, Rush Limbaugh has been calling a courageous college woman a slut and prostitute for supporting contraception (OH THE HORROR, college girls having sex. What a crime, we must call her petty names, and spread lies and misinformation!), and idiots performing idiotic "studies" that would determine that girls with slightly longer ring fingers than index fingers are lesbian pirates.

I'm sorry to say that you actually heard me correctly. Lesbian pirates. Yeah.

I mention all of this crud to remind you all that even America isn't safe from misogyny. We might hear stories of the terrifying crap that goes on in other countries, but we sometimes forget that America still has a long way to go until women are equal. I recommend reading more on feminism, as education and inspiration for fixing the world. I am quite the fan of Greta Christina for this purpose - her articles are as logically secure as an armored vehicle,  and well-written besides.
Machiavelli knew what he was saying when he wrote, "Knowledge is power", though he may not have anticipated the phrase for use in the promotion of education and global cooperation. But that's okay - the ends of global cooperation justify the means of stealing Machiavelli quotes for my own purposes.

Huzzah! Women!

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Ghost Bunny

The thing about my creations is, no matter how horrific, deranged, or completely demonic they look, they will never try to eat your soul with their little bunny teeth.

Except Ghost Bunny, of course. But only when I say so, because I rule all of my creations. 

Do not anger Ghost Bunny. Or his friend Grace. Or me, because Ghost Bunny will suck out your soul. With his little bunny teeth. And then he will proceed to eat it in an adorable manner, rather like a crisp, crunchy